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Our Reasoning

Additional Information

  1. They always say “aboot”.
  2. They love hockey but they suck at it.
  3. They separated us from Alaska.
  4. They say “Eh” way too much.
  5. They call their money ‘Loons’ unlike us with our glorious dollars.
  6. We actually have different weather, they just have ice.
  7. They had their independence just given to them unlike us who had to fight in a glorious revolution.
  8. They are weak and could be easily conquered.
  9. French people suck. Canadian people suck. French Canadian. I rest my point.
  10. Their food is horrible. Have you ever had Canadian food? I thought so.
  11. They look like beavers.
  12. They smell like moose.
  13. They ruined bacon. It's disgusting now.
  14. They have two languages, just pick one!
  15. They eat beaver tails in vancouver.
  16. They have dumb city names like otowa, Quebec, VAncuver, Newfoundland, Novascotsha, and many more.
  17. They have oil that should be ours.
  18. I want oil. Gas is expensive. If we steal it won't be expensive anymore.
  19. They like men. All of them.
  20. Trannies. All of them.
  21.  Communist. All of them.
  22.  Stupid. All of them.
  23. Quit saying “Eh”. You're not Italian.
  24. They put gravy on everything. That's our thing.
  25.  They have square heads. Stop it. Stop it now. Get your head into a normal shape you Syrup chugging, moose kissing, beaver loving, square headed, little pieces of maple bacon.
  26. They put maple syrup on everything. That's not ok.
  27.  Seriously, just stop saying “Eh”.
  28. Their national anthem sucks. Repeating “Oh Canada” 1,000 times doesn’t make it a song.
  29. THere great value in America.
  30. They are sending geese into our country and taking our ponds. We need to build a net. #KillTheSwampSwans . Donate at killtheswampswans.com  Donald “Da Duck” Trump 2024
  31. They always wear jackets. What is hiding under those? We may never know.
  32. They made those stupid little hats with the ear flaps.
  33. They have stupid monopoly money.
  34. Our flag represents Freedom. There is a maple leaf. That's like us having a cheeseburger on our flag.
  35.  Hockey isn't even a real sport. Play football, you little square head.
  36. There are lint lickers. All of them.
  37.  Canadians are just Americanized Mexicans.
  38. They have large mouths. Why is it so big? It is not supposed to be like that.
  39. Why do they like polar bears so much? There are just grizzlies that were washed with your white clothes.
  40. Canadians think they're better than us but we have more guns so shut up.
  41. The total pushovers. THey did whatever the cheese eating surrender monkeys wanted them to do. Even after the lobster backs conquered them they still simp for the french.
  42. They stole the French job of being owned by the british.
  43. What's so nice about beaver anyway, all they're good for is hats.
  44. There is just another English colony who thinks it's special.
  45. They like ham. Maybe a little too much. ; ) 
  46. Canada thinks they're special just because they're not us, but we're coming for your oil. Just you wait.
  47. Canadians don’t even use diesel, they just drive gassers and hybrid cars like the cissies they are.
  48. They think there accent is so cute but who can even understand what there talking “Aboot”
  49. They have webbed toes. Dang polar bear wannabes.
  50. They have elf ears. That is probably because they are french.
  51. Canada wants to pretend that they kicked the US out in the war of 1812 but they didn’t fight; they were too busy chugging maple syrup and flirting with geese to do anything. We left because we realized how useless and unimportant Canada is, and we got cold.
  52.  Have you ever seen a canadians shoes there litterly a brick made out of wood, stupid clogs.
  53. Also, have you ever seen a Canadian's feet? I thought not, so the question must be asked, do Canadians even have feet? If so, there are probably French people and all.
  54. Canadians are short! That's disgusting. Remember in Shrek Fiona literally picked an ogre over a short person.
  55. Canadians are just the North American version of French people, meaning they suck at making food, waging war, doing literally anything useful, and they're always surrendering.
  56. Canadians eat humans. I have no evidence for that but that doesn’t matter because I said so now it's true.
  57. Canadians have really big noses, what are they smelling? They need to be stopped.
  58. Their eyes are huge, they always look shocked and scared about everything.
  59. All Canadians are clones, they all say “Eh” and “Aboot” . They like geese, moose, maple syrup, and beavers, and they all like men.
  60. Q: Why did the Canadians switch to soccer                                   A: Because there gay
  61. They're all just free loading tree hugging hippies or their lumberjacks, those guys just smack trees for a living.
  62. They think it's cool because they wear big jackets. That's the ruskies thing.
  63. They have massive feet. What is up with that?
  64. They eat ice for fun. They think that ice is nice, but rice with lice is nicer than ice, so not very nice.
  65. They think ice skating is a real sport. (It’s Not)
  66. They always wear wool flannel. Do they not have any other clothes there?
  67. They're dogs are weird and ugly. Why so hairy?
  68. They still like men. All of them.
  69. Their hair is horribly ugly.
  70. They think the plural version of leaf is “leafs”, retards. Yah dumb peice of maple bacon.
  71. They pretend to be nice, but everyone who's there just suck ups.
  72. They pretend to be our friends but they're really plotting to destroy us and take Alaska.
  73. We don't have some other countries' leaders from 100 years ago on our monopoly money.
  74. They think they can use their coins in america. Nobody likes their loonies and toonies.
  75. They say “Zed” . That's horrible.
  76. They're dirty square headed liars, we can't trust them.
  77. They're expensive, why does everything  cost so much?
  78. They made poutine. They taste good, but since it's Canadian it's disgusting.
  79. Canadians invented the garbage bag. All they're good for is taking out the trash.
  80. They just should not exist. God must have pressed the wrong button then it was too late to fix it.
  81. Canadians invented the pager. Seriously, I don't even know what that means.
  82. They wear dumb sweaters. You dirty hippie.
  83. They're literally the kmart equivalent of french people.
  84. They think their country is beautiful but that's just the syrup talking (it's super duper ugly).
  85. They can't count to 85. Dumb peices of a Maple bacon.
  86. Canada stands for : Canned-Autistic-Nation-And-Dumb- Artist. 
  87. Mounties are dumb. Thats a dumb name, also who wears those stupid hats and retarted red coats.
  88. They voted for Joe Biden.
  89. They literally live in igloos.
  90. They all have speech impediments and can't speak basic English correctly.
  91. If your cousin moves to Canada, smother them and everyone they love in maple syrup.
  92. THey eat maple syrup. You can't just do that.
  93. I know a man who is related to someone who is technically a man (though he doesn’t act like one). He moved to Canada. Disappointment and disgust.
  94. They seriously eat too much ham. They don't just like it, they LOO000VE it!!!
  95. Most of them are wannabes, rhinestone, and gay coyboys. 
  96. They like hereford cows way too much. ;)
  97. ( : This smile is backwards just like canadians.
  98. They smack seals in the head with giant clubs. Barbarians!
  99. They like men. A little too much! (GAY)
  100. Their pro rodeos will never be as good as PRCA.
  101. Their smelly bellies!
  102. They think it is OK to come to America and say “EH, ABOOT AND ZED”. (Disgusting)
  103. They wear fringe leather coats, that's John Wayne’s thing! (How dare they)
  104. Seriously why do they say “Eh” it sounds like they are an old man who can't hear.
  105. They are like the Brazilians, they come to America to rodeo but they don’t want us to rodeo there.
  106. If you are a Canadian and visit America PLEASE take Justin Bieber back with you. Dan + Shay were already stupid and gay but Justin Beiber just brought them down even more.
  107. If they get lost they just follow a moose.
  108. If the plural form of goose is geese then why not moose is meese? Try explaining that Canada! 
  109. They have brainwashed Americans to visit and move to Canada, it needs to be stopped.
  110. They are buttsnacks. All of them.
  111. They can’t grow proper beards, only stubble and weird mustaches.
  112. Canadians are actually just blobs of walking syrup and snow who pretend to be human so they can infiltrate our country and eat our people just like we eat syrup. Sad.
  113. They don’t know how to sing. Disgusting. 
  114. Why are half of their people named ‘Justin’. What a dumb name.
  115. There are snowmen who like men!!! Haha!
  116. Their beer is horrible. At least I think so, nobody knows since nobody ever tried it! (Haha!)
  117. They say it's great to have free health care, but they're just too lazy to actually pay for anything.
  118. Poutine is disgusting. Disgusting.
  119. Canadians are bullies, they constantly make fun of us for stuff that isn’t true and it's mean. :(
  120. Their army sucks, and they don't know how to take a beachfront.
  121. It's illegal to pay with too many coins in Canada, the tyrants!
  122. Superman was co-created by a Canadian, so that means that Superman is half stupid!
  123. Santa's address is listed in Canada. They took him hostage, we must liberate Santa!
  124. Canada has less gravity than anywhere else in the world, that's not supposed to be like that, it's unnatural. They reject nature.
  125. Canada is the second largest country in the world, fatties!
  126. You can’t even climb trees in Canada. Tyrants!
  127. Tim Horton. That’s a dumb name.
  128. Ketchup flavored potato chips. That’s disgusting!!!
  129. They think that circles are colors. Idiots.
  130. Q:What do you call a Canadian who's cold?                                                A: A dumb peice of maple bacon.
  131. They're so proud of the fact that they can speak English, but they can't even do that right. Stupid accents.
  132. They don’t take guns everywhere.
  133. They only drink maple syrup.
  134. Their only exports are maple syrup and frozen water.
  135. They control prices to make sure that we have to pay more for the maple syrup.
  136. They think that multiple meese is pronounced moose, that means one moose, idiots.
  137. They eat ice cubes for sport.
  138. They don’t celebrate the Fourth of July, commie scum.
  139. There cars are tiny and too small and always get stuck in the snow.
  140. They dry up maple syrup for glass, that’s a horrible idea it’s to sticky, dumb peices of maple bacon.
  141. They betrayed us in 1812.
  142. They're short.
  143. They can’t make their own anything.
  144. Their just the U.S. if all of America was Portland just a little colder.
  145. Their eyes are larger but they still can’t see as well as everyone else.
  146. They like Chiiina.
  147. We could invade them in a day and win.
  148. Have you ever heard of cool Canadians? I’ll wait.
  149. Ontario exists.
  150. We have more nukes than they do, they have none so we’re better.
  151. They think Subarus are good cars (they're not).
  152. They eat icicles a lot. (WHY)
  153. The stupid swamp swans came to America and have poisioned the brains of Americans to thinking that they taste good. (Nasty)
  154. They pronounce sorry like So0ri. (Why)
  155. They suck at soccer really badly.
  156. The meese get drunk by eating bad apples.
  157. Their EAS alarm sounds like an ambulance that ate the free taco bell from the guy in the dark alley.
  158. Their favorite season is winter BECAUSE THAT IS THE ONLY SAESON THERE! >:(
  159. They act nice but everyone knows they are horrible brainwashing aliens.
  160. They BOIL MAPLE SYRUP AND PUT IT OVER SNOW TO MAKE CANDY. (WHO DOES THAT???)
  161. They call beanies toques. (Why tho)
  162. Oak Island is a hoax.
  163. Molasses is the superior syrup.
  164. Most of the people in Canada look like that guy from the shelf in Kmart.
  165. They think Americans are dumb for not knowing some random fact about there irrelevant country.
  166. Vancouver 
  167. Canada started the First World War.
  168. Canada spelt backwards is stupid in Portuguese.
  169. Half of their country speaks french(that's disgusting)
  170. Canadians enslaved the penguins and forced them to work on syrup farms.
  171. They smell like snow.
  172. They think they are cool by butchering the American language by smushing in english words at the same time.
  173. Toronto
  174. They suck at krunker.
  175. It smells like moose turds there.
  176. Their flag is literally a leaf. (Losers)
  177. If you say Canada really slow it sounds like stupid idiot.
  178. Canada Day is stupid.
  179. They started WW2.
  180. Every person in an insane asylum was born in Canada.
  181. Even the way they say it they sound dumb “CaneDuh”.
  182. Canada? More like Can’tada.
  183. Canadians are soft and chubby. (Dang pushovers)
  184. If you drink the water in Canada you will die.
  185. The average IQ of a Canadian is -69.
  186. They say Canada is peaceful and nice. (Sounds Boring)
  187. They put vinegar on french fries. (Absolutely DISGUSTING)
  188. You could conquer Canada with a knife with no blade.
  189. Handguns are illegal in Canada. (Spinless no freedom dumb moose kissing snow eating stupid peices of maple bacon)
  190. Their school system sucks.
  191. Montreal.
  192. Justin beiber is a joke.
  193. We have guns, they don't. (Haha)
  194. We have birds of freedom like bald eagles, they just have stupid swamp swans.
  195. Our flag represents freedom, what does theirs represent, nothing.
  196. At least we have Summer, Spring, and Fall, all they have is winter. (Ha losers)
  197. No matter how bad our drivers are, they are worse.
  198.  What’s the deal with those stupid little Mountie hats.
  199. Their paper is slightly larger than ours. What are they trying to prove? 
  200. Canada has the reputation of the most boring country, their food sucks, they wear dumb hats, they have big noses, their part French, they’re EVIL, and worst of all THEIR A BUNCH OF DUMB PEICES OF MAPLE BACON!!!!!!
  201. They didn’t win either of the world wars so they suck.
  202. They pronounce H like “Hache” that is the Brit’s thing.
  203. All of the people are either bums or hipsters.
  204. You can’t open carry in Canada. (Babies)
  205. You can’t have automatic weapons and sawed-off shotguns and rifles. (Freedom Haters)
  206. They don’t know what yee yee means. (Retards)

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